Nate Imai – JA community
June 28, 2008Growing up in Massachusetts I was hardly exposed to Japanese American culture as a child. The vast majority of my friends were Caucasian and I spent my time both in and out of school without any real cultural identity. The only real connections I had to my heritage were threefold: We would go to Utah every summer to visit my grandparents and my Hapa cousins, my parents would often cook Japanese food, and I knew basic ‘Yonsei vocabulary’ such as ‘shoyu,’ ‘hashi’ and ‘o-chawan.’ Outside these elements, it did not dawn upon me that I could identify with something beyond my surrounding environment.
It wasn’t until late elementary school that I became aware of Japanese culture. My education came, ironically, when my teacher showed a copy of ‘My Neighbor Totoro’ on the last day of 6th grade, because she didn’t have anything better for us to do. I’m pretty sure she knew little of the movie. After watching that video, however, I became aware of a culture of which I was a part.
It was in middle school where I became more aware of my JA heritage. I went to a wealthy, private school named Buckingham Browne & Nichols located in Cambridge, MA. Many of the students already knew each other from elementary school, but since I entered in the 7th grade, I already felt out of sorts with my classmates. In addition, many of the students at BB&N were very wealthy, and I remember feeling embarrassed to invite friends over to our middle-income home. Put on top of that mostly everyone was white, and I began to feel isolated.
These feelings of separation deepened in high school. I continued at BB&N through high school and many of the division in middle school continued to resonate in my later education. I felt more isolated in high school, because I felt it hard to fit in amongst my peers. As a pretty strong athlete, I became a member of the varsity soccer team my junior and senior year. As with many JAs , however, I remained dedicated to my studies, and refrained from going out much. As a result of my studies, I tended to take higher-level courses. Thus I became stuck in a situation where I was splitting my time with the athletic crowd of my high school and the more academic focused students. I found it hard to identify with either group strongly, and as a result I felt more isolated than before.
Things began to change, however, starting junior year when the third JA in my high school arrived. He was Hapa who identified strongly as JA. This student, Daniel Oshima, was very much like me. He excelled in sports and in the classroom. We both were members of the soccer team and took high-level classes. With someone who finally understood my issues and heritage, I began to warm to my time in school.
When it came to apply for college, I immediately looked to the West coast for two reasons: the weather and Asian Americans. I had come to realize, at that point, that being amongst people who shared a similar culture and heritage with me was extremely important and was worth basing my education around. So far UCLA has been the perfect match for me. A university with a challenging academic program, a large Asian American population, and a great location with its proximity to places like Little Tokyo, I have thrived at this school. Being a part of the Nikkei Student Union has made my time at UCLA educating, strengthening and fulfilling. It has truly been a home away from home and has made me feel more comfortable with myself and others than at any other point in my life.
I don’t remember the first time I actually watched “My Neighbor Totoro” but I do remember that I was also very young and that it soon became one of my favorite movies . I think its now, more so, that I have appreciated that I got to learn more about Japan through films and other cultural outlets. Also, I too, felt that I needed to come to college and immerse myself in a community of AA/APIs. Being surrounded by people that not only look like you, but can also share similar cultural experiences is all the more exciting.
I feel like we almost switched places in some ways- since you grew up on the east coast but are now going to school in CA and I grew up on the west coast but am attending college in Rhode Island. I certainly don’t have the same feeling of JA identity now as I did when I only knew what it was like to live in CA within an easy reach of a JA community. I can’t tell if being around fewer JAs makes my JA identity more pronounced or less- and how that would change if I was going to a school with lots of Japanese Americans.
I’ve found that UCLA is a perfect match for me as well, in ways that I never would’ve imagined. As much as I knew how much I wanted to get involved in the culture clubs before entering college, it didn’t hit me how much of an impact it’d have on my college career. NSU and Kyodo really has defined my college career thus far, and has opened the doors to the JA community, for which I am grateful. I know next year will be another memorable one under your leadership.
Disclaimer: this is kind of a silly comment.
Man, being introduced to your culture by Miyazaki – awesome! I forget when that film came to the US, but I know I was very small. I think we were all obsessed with it.
Private schools – been there too, man. I was also in an anglo private school way above my family’s tax bracket for about a year in middle school. I know there are a lot more of them over on the East Coast, but even here, white people are weird. I can only imagine how strange an experience it must have been for you, looking conspicuously Japanese. Even for me, there was a lot of “what are yous” (a question to which my response is always different) and odd looks from high-strung parents, and most folks think I look white!
Well, nice post, and I salute you.
California was always my first choice for school, too, because I wanted to stay with APIs. After reading your post and everyone else’s I feel like I should actually check out groups like NSU.
Also, first MNT memory: watching it in Japanese with English subtitles with some Japanese exchange students my family was hosting. I still get the theme song stuck my head sometimes…
one of my top things i hate to hear from people are “why are all the [insert your favorite race/ethnicity] always together”. you know… along the lines of “asian kids only hang out with asian kids”, etc. obviously, i’ve only heard this from white people, or a few from people who i guess others would call “white-washed” but i sort of hate that term because its kind of like who are we to judge how they act out their race/ethnicity/culture, etc. anyways, given the western ideal of “individualism”, i think its really hard for white people to understand the need and comfort to be around people who (vaguely) look like you, and consequently most likely also understand parts of your life, etc. then again, i also think individualism is part of the root of all evil i.e. our perpetuated racist/racialized society. in a power structure such as the u.s. where people are targeted according to this arbitrary social construct we call “race”, it completely makes sense that thus people of color would want to seek security and comfort among those with shared positions on this racial ladder. i’d go on with more race theory, but my actual point was that i’m really happy you got to find your community where you feel more comfortable with yourself, etc. holler!
good stuff Nate. I too went to a super caucasian rich people middle school, but I’m sure its only a fraction of the experience you went through in Massachusetts. But I don’t regret going through that and I’m sure you don’t too. It was an important part of understanding who I am, and through it I understand the importance of having a community people can connect with. I know we can make our NSU bomb next year, and provide many different ways in which people can connect in their own way, and find their home away from home just like you and me. Hope you’re having a good time at JACCC, I’m glad I get to work with you next year on board.
GOing off of what Kristin said, I think that a lot of young people of color seek out friends that share their same ethnicity/culture/background at some point or another because growing up in American culture a lot of times all you see are white and black people in the media, etc. It’s tough to grow up and have TV tell you that you don’t look like “normal” people, even tougher when your daily life affirms this message. I worry about what that does to kids’ self-images, and I got to thinking about how I grew up without most of those issues. I think that in my case it came from the love and acceptance that both sides of my family treated me with. I am glad that you have found a place where you feel comfortable and accepted!